Immersion Therapy
by LolWorthy
Summary: Because things weren't ever the same when nii-chan died and in a lot of ways, she could never get over it. A little Ichihime


A/N: This is the first Ichihime I've wrote in a really long time, and I found myself taken with the idea. I tried to keep to canon as best I could, but there is a bit of variation with how I remember her brother's death happening for her.

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Her hands grip the steering wheel like it's the only think that can ground her to Earth. Her whole body is shaking and she can feel the wetness at her armpits and between her breasts. She's embarrassed and hopes he doesn't notice. She feels like throwing up, but closes her eyes, foot so mashed into the brake pedal that when she gives up a little, the car is still dead stopped. It's set in reverse but she can hardly breathe enough to look behind her, or at least through the rear view mirror, let alone release her death hold on the wheel.

"Okay, now just take a few deep breaths; you can do this, Inoue."

"Kurosaki-kun, I don't know if I _can,"_ and she feels like crying. She remembers the way the only family she ever truly had looked after being mauled by a screaming metal deathtrap. Just like the one she was about to drive. A neighbor had seen the car do it, but hadn't glimpsed the license plate enough to see and remember. Nii-san hadn't been a block away when it had happened, and the sound of screeching wheels and the last glance of the car dragging it's mutilated self away to prey on more innocent people, leaking it's version of blood…

She breathes, just like the love of her life tells her to, and takes comfort that even though he _still_ doesn't know how she feels, even after what's breaking on five long years, he's here. He's here, and he cares. Nothing will happen to her with him around, she knows it.

The car sighs and kicks up the air conditioning and she feels like it's growling at her. _Kami-sama…_

And she throws herself into this pit of her fears full force. Her foot's off the brake. Her eyes are open, peaking at the rear view mirror, but then she turns, and looks behind. It feels as though the car is going sixty miles per hour, even though it's only going about five at most.

"Just don't slam on the brakes," he says and she does, out of reflex.

"Sorry, sorry. Oh Kurosaki-kun," she leans her face against the steering wheel, stopped again, the tail of the car poking into the street. He reaches over to pet her hair to comfort her, unsure of what to really do in this situation.

"It's okay, it's ok. Really, Inoue, just take your time. We have all week. Baby steps."

She starts again, turning the wheel gently and slowly, this metal beast obeying her commands. The steering wheel looks big in her tiny hands. She gulps, out on the street now, foot like lead on the brake pedal as she switches from reverse to drive. The moment of truth.

"Just take it easy for now. Take your foot off the brake, and let it cruise."

"O-okay." Her hands are bone white on the steering wheel and she's starting to get cramps. Her hands feel like jello when she lets them loose. Her foot perches just barely on the gas pedal, afraid to touch it. Her toes flex and the car purrs and suddenly they're _moving._ More than five. Her heart is beating a million miles an hour faster than the car but now she doesn't really know where to go. She stops at the stop sign, putting the blinker on in the wrong direction, fumbling with apologies tumbling out of her stammering mouth like a mantra.

She starts moving again at the wrong moment and another driver flips her The Bird.

"Oh God, oh God, can we stop? I can't…I just can't…"

"Inoue, it's fine," he puts the car in park and gives her a hug, stiffening at the feel of her breasts. The ac's been on low for some time now and it's a wonder, but she feels freezing, and he can feel the nervous earthquakes her body's making, but he can't see how her face became a tomato. "We don't have to continue today if you can't."

And as he moves to unbuckle his seatbelt and get out of the car to her side, her hand stops him, determined. "I-I need to try, Kurosaki-kun. I need to get farther than this stop sign." She thinks maybe there's something philosophical in that, but she doesn't dwell on it. She puts on her brave face, resolute.

"Alright Inoue, if you insist," he's looking at her with those honey brown puppy eyes. He almost wants her to stop, but he believes in her. She can do this.

There's a picnic basket in the back seat for wherever they happen to stop or give up.

But she's going to get them to the park they decided on in advance even if it kills her.

They're going to sit at the park together, and the sun will shine through the bright green leaves on their little picnic blanket. They'll eat the sandwiches together and be happy and not worry at all about conquering their fears or dealing with hollows. It will be just him and her and wasabi and little blue men, trying to coax her to kiss him.

And when the impulse becomes so much she can't bear it, she will. Because she's already faced one fear today, why not the other?

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Reviews are nice.


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